6 Homeschool Lessons Out of One Unfortunate Event

Educational experiences and events in real life are how you turn the world into your classroom. It also makes getting an education fun and engaging for your children. Most importantly, the lessons they learn in the real world, they never forget.

The unfortunate event was that my son did not dry the iron skillet and in the morning I found it completely rusted out.

But as a homeschooling mother, I was delighted. A discovery like this becomes a learning opportunity. The kids pile into the kitchen and a discussion of what’s happened to the pan becomes a day of homeschooling, with all subjects covered.

Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.
— Benjamin Franklin

Upon finding the rusty skillet, your conversation might go something like this:

"Hey, kids, come here! I want you to see something interesting."

"What happened to the pan?" they ask.

"Exactly! Does anyone know what this is?" I point to the rust.

"It looks like rust," they reply.

"It is rust, but do you know why the pan is rusty?

"No, how did it get like that?" They are wondering if the pan is now ruined, and one child looks a little guilty.

The Science Lesson

I then send them off to get their science encyclopedias and they look up how rust is formed. They learn that when impure iron (cast iron) meets water and oxygen, the iron gives some of its electrons to the oxygen and the oxidation process begins.

As rust is formed it eats away at the pan, and, if left for a long period of time, will eventually corrode it, which is exactly why we never leave a wet iron skillet to dry by itself. 

And the Learning Continues

We could go on to teach them about the parts of an atom and how molecules are formed and so on.

We could then explain that the study of chemistry is partly about how matter is made up of different atoms and molecular structures and how they react to one another and how they behave in the physical world.

From the rust on the iron skillet, a host of questions will arise and we will go as deep as the children want in helping them to discover the answer to their questions, plus all the additional things they will learn along the way.

Spoon feeding in the long run teaches us nothing but the shape of the spoon.
— E.M. Forster

This is the kind of learning that engages children, fosters their interest in the world, and keeps them wanting to know more.

The Writing Lesson

The children can write a few lines or a paragraph, depending upon their age, about their understanding of how rust forms and anything else they learned around this discovery. We could also take them to the library to find books that elaborate more about some of the things they are questioning. 

The History Lesson

We could then move on to history and teach them about the Iron Age. We could also give them a little history about how iron skillets and griddles were the mainstay in a woman's kitchen prior to the 20th century, later to be replaced by non-stick pans with plastic coating.

“Education is the kindling of a flame, not the filling of a vessel.”
― Socrates

The Philosophy Lesson

We could venture even further and discuss man’s tendency to NOT leave well enough alone and create problems where there were none before. Instead of a little scrubbing, we now cook with plastic-coated pans that produce off-gassing toxic enough to kill a small bird. Who knows what it will do to our health over the time? And so we ask, was the invention of the plastic-coated pan really such an improvement?

The Theology Lesson

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This conversation could lead into a conversation about living more in-tune with God’s creation, rather than polluting it with man-made goods, especially when those man-made goods stem from greed.

The Moral Lesson

But the biggest lesson to be learned is the lesson of doing things right, which brings us back to why there was rust in the skillet in the first place. When you find your children doing a substandard job, here is a poem they can recite to etch the reminder to “do their best” into their conscience.

Work while you work,

Play while you play,

This is the way, 

To be happy each day.

 

All that you do,

Do with your might,

Things done by halves

Are never done right.

Anon.

Now you can see how a little rust in a skillet becomes fodder for science, writing, history, and even a philosophy lesson. You could go on to include more subjects but this is just a sample of how to approach the art of homeschooling.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework for homeschooling brighter, happier, engaged kids who can get into the top 20 colleges and excel in their personal and professional lives.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Liz's unique course to raise a serious reader, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of younger children, who are concerned that their children develop well physically, emotionally, neurologically (brain), and intellectually, start with Liz’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 23 years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling. For a copy of The Short Angry History of Compulsory Schooling, click here.

Is Thanksgiving a Celebration of Massacre?

When it comes to the holiday of "Thanks" giving, I hear people spouting rhetoric about how we are celebrating a massacre of innocent people; and I can't help but think we have fallen deeper into the rhetoric of divisiveness generated by political motives that are not in our best interest.

I have celebrated the holiday of "Thanks" giving my entire life, but I have never celebrated the killing of innocent people. 

It was president Lincoln who declared Thanksgiving a national holiday, not to celebrate a massacre but to celebrate a day of gratitude. 

I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, …to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving...

And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him …,

they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquility and Union.
— President Lincoln

The divisive rhetoric today pitting this group against the other group is an age-old device going back to Julius Caesar's, "Divide and Conquer."

Division is the tactic. Conquer is the goal.

We have fallen into the trap where we point our fingers at one another, while our civil liberties are being eroded and our tax dollars are funding wars of brutality.

Yet, as the saying goes, there are two sides to every coin. Most of life does not take place in the zones of black and white.

Most of it takes place in the grey zone;  the zone that's up for interpretation. And not one of us has absolute knowledge about everything.

Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.
— Chief Seattle, Duwamish

History is rife with people overcoming one another in the most heinous of ways. "White" is only one of the many colors of men who have committed brutalities throughout history and who continue to commit them today. 

As I write, I'm sitting at my desk on the soil where the Persians conquered the kingdoms of the Medes and Lydians. 

I'm sitting at my desk on the soil where the Turks massacred the Greeks, Armenians, and the Kurds. 

And I'm sitting at my desk on the continent where Pol Pot committed genocide against the people of Cambodia. 

We will be known forever by the tracks we leave.
— Dakota Tribe

To the North of me, the Russians and the Ukrainians are fighting; to the south of me, the Arabs and the Israelis wage war against one another.

This is man's nature - no skin color has a monopoly on brutality. Nonsense!

All men share the same human nature; we are all made up of the same parts, including arrogance and greed. We also share qualities of mercy and generosity.

We are complex beings and life is full of complexities.

So instead of attacking the character of the "white" man on this day, spend it as President Lincoln intended it to be spent, by giving thanks to the Divine for all that we have. 

No matter what difficulties befall us, as long as we are breathing we have something to be grateful for. And as long as we remember this, we'll raise kids who do the same. 

Along with thanks to the Divine, let's celebrate the Native Americans and their beautiful legacy of wisdom on how to live with reverence and respect for all living things. It's a philosophy that we could all reflect on more. 

Honor the sacred. Honor the Earth, our Mother. Honor the Elders. Honor all with whom we share the Earth:-Four-leggeds, two-leggeds, winged ones, Swimmers, crawlers, plant and rock people. Walk in balance and beauty.
— Native American Elder

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Thoughts on Gratitude to Brighten Your Day.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework for homeschooling brighter, happier, engaged kids who can get into the top 20 colleges and excel in their personal and professional lives.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Liz's unique course to raise a serious reader, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of younger children, who are concerned that their children develop well physically, emotionally, neurologically (brain), and intellectually, start with Liz’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 23 years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling. For a copy of The Short Angry History of Compulsory Schooling, click here.

6 Ways Public Schools Cause More Harm Than Good

Public school is toxic for a child’s heart and mind. When we understand the agenda behind it, we’ll do everything in our power to protect our kids, just like we do when we put medicine out of their reach.

Below is an excerpt from an essay by John Taylor Gatto which explains why public schools are such unhealthy places for our kids. It’s an essay no parent will want to miss.

The Short, Angry History of Compulsory  Schooling

Theorists from Plato to Rousseau knew well, and explicitly taught, that if children could be kept childish beyond the natural term, if they could be cloistered in a society of children, if they could be stripped of responsibility, if their inner lives could be starved by removing the insights of historians, philosophers, economists, novelists, and religious figures, if the inevitability of suffering and death could be removed from daily consciousness and replaced with the trivializing emotions of greed, envy, jealousy, and fear then young people would grow older but they would never grow up.

In this way a great enduring problem of supervision would be decisively minimized, for who can argue against the truth that childish and childlike people are far easier to manage than accomplished critical thinkers.

With this thought in mind, you're ready to hear the six purposes of modern schooling I found in Dr. Inglis' book. The principles are his, just as he stated them nearly 100 years ago, some of the interpretive material is my own.

1st Function

The first function of schooling is adjustive. Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.

Fixed habits.

Of course this precludes critical judgement completely. If you were to devise a reliable test of whether someone had achieved fixed habits of reaction to authority, notice that requiring obedience to stupid orders would measure this better than requiring obedience to sensible orders ever could.

You can't know whether someone is reflexively obedient until you can make them do foolish things.

2nd  Function

Second is the diagnostic function. School is to determine each student's proper social role, logging evidence mathematically and anecdotally on cumulative records.

3rd Function

Third is the sorting function. Schools sort children by training individuals only so far as their likely destination in the social machine and not one step further. So much for making boys and girls their personal best.

4th Function

The fourth function is conformity. As much as possible, kids are to be made alike. As egalitarian as this sounds, its purpose is to assist market and government research, people who conform are predictable.

5th Function

The fifth function Inglis calls "the hygienic function”. It has nothing to do with bodily health. It concerns what Darwin, Galton, Inglis, and many important names from the past and present would call, "the health of the race."

Hygiene is a polite way of saying that school is expected to accelerate natural selection by tagging the unfit so clearly they will drop from the reproduction sweepstakes.

That's what all those little humiliations from first grade onward, and all the posted lists of ranked grades are really about. The unfit will either drop out from anger, despair, or because their likely mates will accept the school's judgement of their inferiority.

6th Function

And last is the propaedeutic function. A fancy Greek term meaning that a small fraction of kids will quietly be taught how to take over management of this continuing project, made guardians of a population deliberately dumbed down and rendered childish in order that government and economic life can be managed with a minimum of hassle.”

What Will You Do?

And there you have it, in a nutshell, so how will you educate your children?

There was a time when the government schooling agenda was obscure  but that time has passed.

From the incompetency in key subjects to our severely low literacy rates, we have to face the truth.

Our tumbling literacy rates reflect the dumbed-down minds of our people.

If we want to raise children who are not dumbed-down, children who are not lacking in common decency, then we need to do something about it.

And that something is not school.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework for homeschooling brighter, happier, engaged kids who can get into the top 20 colleges and excel in their personal and professional lives.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Liz's unique course to raise a serious reader, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of younger children, who are concerned that their children develop well physically, emotionally, neurologically (brain), and intellectually, start with Liz’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 23 years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling. For a copy of The Short Angry History of Compulsory Schooling, click here.

5 Ways to Encourage Your Child's Love of Learning

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A friend showed me a clip of her nine-month-old baby trying to imitate her mother's expressions. I looked into the baby's eyes as I watched the video and the intense alertness that I witnessed, the acute observation of each facial move in her mother's face, was fascinating.

The baby wanted to know how to make the same faces her mother was making, and she was trying to understand how to do this by conducting a scientific investigation.

It's the intense desire to know that all healthy children possess, yet what happens to their curiosity as they grow older? Why do so many children forsake that infinite sense of wonder that is so innate to each of us? 

No thief, however skillful, can rob one of knowledge, and that is why knowledge is the best and safest treasure to acquire.
— L. Frank Baum

One of the reasons this happens today is because too many children start school at young ages, and by the time they reach kindergarten, first grade, if they are lucky, the light within them begins to dim.

Consider this: if your child’s desire to explore and understand the world around him is constantly thwarted by a teacher’s dictates, he will begin to give up his investigative work, and his sense of curiosity will eventually wilt.

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For example, if a child has a small shovel in his hand, but every time he tries to shovel something a teacher tells him to stop, he will eventually stop picking the shovel up.

When a child cannot follow the lead of his curiosity, or is not in an environment where he can exercise his desire to know, as children who are in daycare and preschools from early ages are, they begin to put their curiosity down. 

If you have a child whose curiosity is waning, or whose curiosity you want to stimulate, here are five things you can do:

  1. If you have to put your child into an outside program, look for a daycare or preschool that is play-based and ideally held in the outdoors, such as a Forest School. Make sure they are operated by people who understand what children need at these tender ages. If you aren't sure what the philosophy for the school is, ask them. Please do not be shy about these matters; after all, this is your child, and you want to make sure he is under the best care.

  2. Immediately remove all screens from your child's life both inside and outside the home. Under no circumstances should you hand him your cell phone to quiet him because you are busy. Screens are a cause of a dimming curiosity; not only that but they will thwart your child's brain development

  3. Do not entertain your child! Let him entertain himself. It is not that you don't ever play with your child, but only that you do not become his full-time playmate. Allow him to follow the dictates of his curiosity and figure things out for himself. Children are little scientists; let him conduct his own experiments. 

  4. Be curious yourself. Take your child into the outdoors and explore with him. Let him walk barefoot on fallen leaves and dip his feet into spring water to awaken his senses. Bring his attention to the songs of birds and the rustling of the trees as the wind blows through them. Collect a bug or two and read about them when you get home. Notice a particular bird sound (my favorite is the red-winged blackbird!) and look the bird up in a reference book or on the internet when you get home. Try to imitate the bird's song with your child. Ask him questions to stimulate a conversation and discover the answers together, such as how birds fly and what foods they eat. 

  5. Lastly, if you can, don't put your child into any school programs until he is at least ten years old. Until then, teach him yourself because so many learning problems take root during those early years. The first few grades of elementary school are easy to teach when you know what you are doing. 

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Remember that the desire to know is our natural state, but we have this yearning socialized out of us in various ways, the least not being school. Our innate desire to know, however, is still there within us.

An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.
— Benjamin Franklin

If your child's desire for knowledge has dimmed, trust that you can help him awaken it; because reaching his full potential in life begins with the desire to know.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework for homeschooling brighter, happier, engaged kids who can get into the top 20 colleges and excel in their personal and professional lives.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Liz's unique course to raise a serious reader, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of younger children, who are concerned that their children develop well physically, emotionally, neurologically (brain), and intellectually please begin with Liz’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 22+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Can You Homeschool Without Feeling Overwhelmed?

Can You Homeschool Without Feeling Overwhelmed?

Being a mother today, with limited or no family support, is a challenge. On our best days we can feel a little like we are going nuts. And then we throw in the idea of homeschooling, at least some of us do, and then we panic for surely we will go nuts! But, it isn't actually like that and somehow most of us manage to keep ourselves relatively sane.

Read More

Here’s One State Which Ordered the Moms to Teach Their Kids!

Here’s One State Which Ordered the Moms to Teach Their Kids!

Here's another gem from the book: "Immigrants who were educated in Europe often became private schoolmasters, advertising in the newspapers that they would teach algebra, geometry, trigonometry, surveying, navigation, french, Latin, Greek, rhetoric, English, belles lettres, logic, philosophy, and other subjects. Wow! Does anyone even know anyone who knows all of this today? If we do, they are usually not found teaching children!

Read More

4 Strategies to Raise Children of Good Character

Societal influences can make it easy or difficult to raise a child who is well-mannered, respectful, and resourceful.

In today’s social climate, we face many parenting challenges, but there are strategies you can implement to ensure a better outcome for your family.

When our children are young, we want to train them to do the right thing, so they develop the right habits in childhood and learn to make the right choices.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

It begins with little things such as learning to pick up after themselves, doing chores before they play, and learning to be considerate of other people's needs.

Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential. If the parents treat each other courteously, are respectful towards family and friends, and honest and helpful with others, the children are more likely to follow suit.

Discipline

As no child is born a civilized human being, there is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too. In fact, raising our children to become civilized human beings is the essence of our work.

Good parents can produce bad children; there are no guarantees that children turn out well.

Discipline is key to developing the qualities that make up good character, as it takes discipline to do what is demanded of us!

Think of how much discipline it takes to pass up a piece of chocolate cake, to put away the screens, to go the gym.

Discipline is a key trait that most of us never develop. It is what sets the above-average, who reach great heights in their endeavors, from those who never will.

Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now the norms. Children sent to school for eight hours a day where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them, are at a disadvantage.

However children who spend their days in a homeschooled environment are with adults who are able to put the time and effort into guiding the kids in the right ways.

At home, we do have authority over our children and can discipline them as needed. The right training in childhood is essential to raising a well-mannered, happy child.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 60's cultural revolution when sound parenting principles were abandoned for unproven theories.

Multi Media

Another disadvantage to raising children today is the decline in quality films and the introduction of screen activities.

The films are vulgar, the music is ribald, childhood games are on screens, and texting replaces real conversation.

On top of that, social media alone is causing a distortion of the way children see themselves and the world, leading to a host of mental health issues.

Negative influences will unravel any good work you've done to raise your children well, which is why we need to be diligent with the environments that influence our children.

The aforementioned should be a strict NO for every concerned!

The Ancient Greeks knew that bad influences in a child's life would affect their characters. It is really just a matter of common sense, something the Ancient Greeks had plenty of.

We’ve buried our head’s in the sand, though, because we believe we can put our children into these environments and all will be fine.

Our children are telling us a different story, and it’s time we start listening to them.

We have a generation of children, raised on technology, who are becoming active in the movement to protect children from the ill-effects of technology, because they can see the damage it has caused to their generation.

A Dishonest Trend

Dishonesty is a serious character defect, but it is common now. Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren are dishonest according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

Even without the statistics, we know from experience that we are no longer an honest society. Each of us deals with it every single day.

During the Covid days, my son took a statistics exam online, only to receive an email from the teacher announcing that some of the students had cheated on the exam.

I was told the exam was easy, too. College students cheating on an easy exam?

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

Cheating is a habit for many children today.

When cheating on exams is pardoned with no serious repercussions, we are tolerating dishonesty and teaching our kids that it is no big deal.

But it is a big deal. Bad character is a big deal because these people cause harm to others, and they cause harm to themselves.

For sure, they don’t sleep well at night.

These students have learned to become dishonest people, because they are raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of truth, goodness, and beauty.

It’s difficult to believe now that such values were once so honored in the West, but it is true.

In a Nutshell

Protect your children from the negative influences in society for as long as you can. Raise them in a bubble! Allow them the time to develop in healthy ways; physically, morally, and intellectually, because the bubble will burst.

When it does, you want to feel confident that you did your job well, by giving your children the right kind of start in life.

The rest is up to them.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

11 Ways to Convince your Spouse to Homeschool (even if you think he'll never agree!)

If your husband or wife’s mind is already set against homeschooling, you have to approach the situation very gingerly. It’s not wise to push our views on someone, least of all a spouse.  

It is time that we squarely face the fact that institutional schoolteaching is destructive to children.
— John Taylor Gatto

Usually when a spouse doesn’t agree with homeschooling, it’s because he doesn’t understand what John Taylor Gatto refers to as "the dangers of public school."

The Conversation

But you can start the conversation by asking your spouse a question, such as, "What are your hopes and goals for our children’s education?"

You have now opened the channels for him to let you know his hopes and goals in a non-threatening way. As he shares these with you, listen for his concerns too.

Once you’ve got a friendly discussion going, approach the subject of homeschooling.

If you were to consider homeschooling, would he have any objections or concerns? If so, what would those be?

The Objections

The typical objections to homeschooling are the following:

  • The children will be academically behind and fail to get into a reputable college.

  • Homeschooled kids lack good social skills.

  • Homeschooled children don’t have any friends.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you’re an accredited teacher.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you have a college degree.

Maybe your husband doesn't know any homeschoolers and the idea sounds too fantastic to him?

Keep in mind that your spouse wants what is best for his children just as much as you do.

The Persuasion

Whatever his objections are, you want to take note and ask him if he would be open to watching some videos on the subject, looking at some research, or even reading some books together.

If you keep the conversation neutral and show a genuine interest in his views and concerns, most reasonable husbands will oblige their wives. 

Now, here comes the tricky part: you will need to provide him with information that is sound and relevant.

No need to panic though because we have you covered. You can download our free resource list to convince anyone about the merits of homeschooling.

The list will provide you with 11 resources to educate your husband (or anyone) about the many problems with public school and why homeschooling is the best option today. 

This resource is also helpful if you have family members or friends who are strongly opposed to homeschooling.

Grab your free download here: 11 Resources to Convince Anyone to Homeschool.

Once someone truly understands what is fundamentally wrong with public school, it is near impossible to put a child into it unless the person has no other choice.

Some Cautionary Advice

Be careful about taking the attitude of proving your spouse wrong. No one likes to be proven wrong, and trying to show your spouse that you were right will not help your cause. 

Instead, you want to humble yourself and be gentle in the way you handle the situation.

Go slowly.

When someone has a fixed opinion, it’s prudent to allow time for that person to shift into a new mindset.

Start early by educating your spouse when your children are young.

By the time they are ready to go to school, hopefully, you'll both be excited about homeschooling! 

School is a twelve-year jail sentence where bad habits are the only curriculum truly learned. I teach school and win awards doing it. I should know.
— John Taylor Gatto

Upcoming FREE Live Masterclass! Discover 3 Homeschooling Mistakes No One Tells You About! with Liz Hanson

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Don't Teach Your Children About Diversity!

One of the beauties of homeschooling is that we can protect our children from political agendas that don't serve mankind, and the diversity issue may be one of them.

It mirrors the old military strategy of Julius Caesar's, "divide and conquer."

And Julius Caesar was no dummy.

So why is diversity the wrong conversation to have with your children? The best illustration for arguing against a topic which has divided so many of us is the example of my mother. 

My mother was different from the social-justice warriors you hear about today. An original warrior, she never preached to anyone, she wasn't spouting angry rhetoric about perceived wrongs, she never felt better than you or me because of the services she did; she just helped where she saw that people needed help.

When I was a young child, my mother was very active in the Civil Rights Movement, a violent and bloody time in America. Despite the dangers, she relentlessly marched with the oppressed in their struggle for equality, more worried about their safety than she was her own.

The World Encyclopedia even included a picture of her and my sister Kathleen, who had both flown across the country to demonstrate with hundreds of other people in the historic march on Selma, Alabama, led by Martin Luther King, Jr., in 1965.

My mother is on the left, my sister is holding the sign.

As I became a young woman, my mother, who was now middle-aged, served on the board for the homeless people where she listened to their stories, helped them get shelter, and assisted people in getting back on their feet.

She said to me once that homeless people weren't the bums others thought they were; they were usually people who'd had some hardship in life with no one to fall back on for support, and they'd ended up on the streets. 

Her heart always went out to the underserved amongst us.

When I hit my middle-ages, my mother, who was now an old woman, served as a volunteer teaching the Hispanic community English. She did that until she became ill at the age of ninety. 

To my mother, each life mattered because each life contained a human heart and that human heart possessed inherent dignity and worth. That was the ideal my mother embodied and lived by.

Color, religion, race; those weren't labels she understood.

She recognized that we all suffer the loss of loved ones, we all worry about our children, most of us struggle with our siblings, some of us wonder if God exists and many of us question why so much killing and suffering happens in the name of religion.  

There’s more sameness in us than there is difference.

The Diversity Rhetoric Questioned

Some years back, after my mother passed away, I had a series of experiences which led me to question the new diversity rhetoric that had emerged, such as the time I was asked to give a talk on education to a group of mothers from varying backgrounds. 

In defense of diversity, a woman of color felt it her duty to ask me why I only promoted books written by white people. Well, I don't, I explained. I promote books for the quality of the writing and content, not because of the skin color of the author. 

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.
— Rumi

The fact is that there are only six canons of great literature in the world and one of them belongs to the West.

I had wanted to introduce these women to our body of great books for children—not all of whom were written by white people—but this particular mom could only see the color of my skin and what she thought was the color of the authors' skin. 

Another experience was with a friend who espoused diversity ideals. When Trump became president, this particular friend of mine from an Eastern country grew livid and said to me,  "The white people have shown their true colors!" 

I had never seen my friend in terms of her skin color, yet she had just revealed that that was exactly how she saw me. I was her "white" friend and now my people had shown their true colors. 

But the experience that took the cake was when an academic corrected me after I objected to the racism of a certain "movement"  which  was in vogue at the time. 

She informed me that I could not accuse other people of being racist because I was white and only white people were racist. Her lack of logical reasoning dumbfounded me.

When you have lived in many different countries, as I have, you learn about  different cultures and different ways of viewing the world. I can tell you first-hand that I have never met a people who did not think they were better than another people.

In every country I’ve lived in, there’s always been the majority group who believed they were better than the minority group or they were better than the people of a neighboring country.

And then there's the individuals; us. Have you ever known an individual who did not express a judgement on another individual, either verbally or by inference?

We expose our petty, self-righteous arrogance every day; she gossips too much, he's too ambitious, he's too materialistic, she's too bossy. 

Whatever they is, we is above it, right?

We’re all islands shouting lies to each other across seas of misunderstanding.
— Rudyard Kipling

We all contain seeds of the virtues in our hearts such as compassion, generosity, temperance.

However, our hearts also contain seeds of the vices, such as envy, anger, greed.

But the crowning vice is arrogance, and some of us cultivate the roots of it more than we like to admit, even to ourselves.

Yet, what is racism, if not arrogance?

The Danger of the Group

There are a lot of diverse groups in America and they largely stick to their own kind. Maybe it's a kind of religion; or a kind of race, or a kind of political ideology, but "groups" tend to keep to their own, which makes sense because, after all, they are groups.

But there is something dangerous about  a clustering of kind when we base our identity on the "group" we belong to and see people outside of the "group" as the "other."

Barbara Coloroso, a parenting expert who had studied the genocide in Rwanda, said that the seeds of  genocide take root when we objectify a group of people as "other."

Rather than see them as fellow human beings traveling with us through the journey of life, we see them as "different" from us. 

And that's the crux of the matter. When we teach about diversity, we are teaching about differences, we are teaching about the "other."

If we allow our identity to be based on the identity of a particular  group  instead of our shared humanity, we lose sight of the inward bonds of our collective hearts. 

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.
— Mother Teresa

It's not that we can't be a member in a group, but let's not be of the group. And if we have to identify with a group, then let's identify with the group of human beings who shed tears of joy and sorrow for all the same things.

That was the group to which my mother belonged.

Instead of teaching our children about our differences, I'm suggesting we raise our children to focus on our samenesses.

Genocide is genocide; it doesn't matter who is committing it or who it's being committed against. 

When it comes to the innocent slaughter of women and children; regardless of their race, religion, or color, who are we being if we don't stand on the side of mercy?

Who are we when we raise our children to think in terms of "otherness" instead of the common bond of the human heart?

When we dismiss a child's book, not on whether or not the book is worth reading, but because of the skin color of the authors, haven't we ourselves nurtured the seed of genocide?

Upcoming FREE Masterclass! Discover 3 Homeschooling Mistakes No One Tells You About
with Liz Hanson

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Don't Homeschool If Your Children Have This One Bad Habit!

The most frequent complaint I get from homeschooling moms is that their children don't listen to them. It's more than just a complaint  because  for a homeschooling mom, not listening is a serious issue.

Children who don't listen, won't obey and children who don't obey, won't get their work done. Which means that you, the homeschooling parent, will struggle  to do your job well. 

The essence of successful discipline is not technique; rather, it is self-confidence.
— John Rosemond, author, A Family of Value

However, I am not suggesting that you put your children into school; but only to train them to listen before you continue homeschooling. After all, the skill of listening is a vital skill and one children must be taught.

An Effective Approach

The most effective approach would be to stop homeschooling for a short period until you get your relationship back on course with your children. 

The reason for this is because the frustration everyone is feeling from the tug of war around studying is probably causing a lot of tension, and your children may develop a negative association with homeschooling if it continues. 

Once your children decide that homeschooling is no fun, instead of one problem, you’ve now got two. So a break is the best strategy for this situation.

But rather than announce you are putting homeschooling on hold until they learn to obey,  announce that next week will be a homeschool break week. You don't need to offer any reason other than, "Because I said so!". 

The Crux of the Matter

Now, you can focus on the issue which, at the core, is a problem of disrespect. Like most parents in the West, your children are not showing you the respect you deserve. 

It's a societal problem for various reasons including, but not limited to, the negative influences on children via multi-media and technology, as well as the push for modern parenting practices that sound great in theory but haven’t worked. 

While there are multiple strategies that should be employed in your efforts to correct your relationship with your children, we'll focus on the primary tactic of assuming the role of leadership.

As two captains will sink a ship, you and your spouse will have to show up as one. In other words, you have one voice. What one says, the other supports, at least in front of the children. Any disagreements you have regarding your children, must be discussed privately.

Successful Parenting Traits

It's critical to understand the traits of successful parents, so you can learn to imitate them until they become your traits, too.

Successful parenting leadership…

  • They are decisive

  • They communicate clear expectations

  • They hold their children accountable

  • They assume authority (not to be confused with "authoritarian")

  • They set clear boundaries

  • They give their children age-appropriate responsibilities

  • They do not bend down to their children's level; they let their children look up to them

If this list sounds too authoritarian, it may be in comparison to the modern advice you've probably been given. 

The question to ask yourself is, how's that working?

Your children need to see you as the authority, someone worthy of respect, someone they can trust to keep their word, and a role model they can emulate.

You want to be a good influence for your children, so you can guide them towards developing good character and excelling in your homeschool. Like us, they won't emulate someone they do not respect. 

The more attention you pay to your child, the less attention he will pay to you.
— John Rosemond

Once you have successfully established your boundaries by assuming the role of leader, your children will listen and obey you and homeschooling will be more fun and fruitful. 

Effective parenting leadership must include unconditional  love, but I know you have that part covered. 

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

The Six Purposes of Schooling by John Taylor Gatto

School bus.png

When people ask me why I homeschooled, I tell them I had no choice. If they knew what I knew about public education, they would homeschool too.

John Taylor Gatto was the man who opened my eyes to the nefarious agenda behind institutionalized schooling. What follows is a transcription of the key section from John’s classic speech and opus, The Underground History of American Education.

John was a brilliant and well-researched man. I have read what is below in Ingles’ book myself; it is all true.   

Transcription of John’s Talk

“I have something here.  I have the six purposes of schooling [from the book Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis] as laid down in 1917 by the man whom Harvard named their Honor Lecture in Education for. 

So far from being a fringe individual, this guy is the reason the Harvard Honor Lecture in Education is named as it is:  The Inglis Lecture.  I would like to read you the six purposes of schooling.  I moved heaven and earth as it took years to find this book [Principles of Secondary Education]--just like trying to find in past years a copy of the Carol Quigley [book] Tragedy and Hope.  

I learned about Inglis from a twenty year President of Harvard [1933-1953], James Bryant Conant, who was a poison gas specialist in World War I--and was in the very inner circle of the Atomic Bomb Project in World War II--was High Commissioner of Occupied Germany after the War. 

So he [James Bryant Conant] wrote--there must be 20 books about the institution of schooling--of which he was completely a proponent.  And he is a very, very bad writer.  I forced myself to read most of these books, and one of them he says that if you really want to know what school is about, you need to pick up the book that I’m referring to Principles of Secondary Education

Two years it took me to find a copy of the book [Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis]--750 pages, tiny print and as dull as your imagination can be.  And furthermore, it is not till you get to the very middle of the book--in an unlabelled section--that he spills the beans.  Let me spill them for you.  

 There are six purposes, or functions, as he calls them.  The first he [Alexander Inglis] calls the Adjustive Function: Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.  That’s their main purpose--habits and reactions to authority. 

That is why school authorities don’t tear their hair out when somebody exposes that the Atomic Bomb wasn’t dropped on Korea, as a history book in the 1990s printed by Scott Foresman [did], and why each of these books has hundreds of substantive errors.  Learning isn’t the reason the texts are distributed.  

The Adjustive Function

So, first is the Adjustive Function--fixed habits.  Now here comes the wonderful insight that being able to analyze the detail will give you.  How can you establish whether someone has successfully developed this Automatic Reaction because people have a proclivity when they are given sensible orders to follow. 

That is not what they want to teach.  The only way you can measure this is to give stupid orders and people automatically follow those.  Now you have achieved Function #1.  

The Integrating Function

Have you ever ever wondered why some of the foolish things that schools do or allow to continue?  [Function] #2, he [Inglis] calls it the Integrating Function, but it is easier to understand if you call it the Conformity Function. 

It’s to make children alike as possible--the gifted children and the stupid--alike as possible because market research uses statistical sampling, and it only works if people react generally the same way.  

The Directive Function

The Third Function he calls the Directive Function: School is to diagnose your proper social role and then log the evidence that here is where you are on the Great Pyramid, so that future people won’t allow you to escape that compartment.  

The Differentiating Function

 The Fourth Function is the Differentiating Function.  Because once you have diagnosed the kids in this layer, you do not want them to learn anything that the higher layers are learning.  So you teach just as far as the requirement of that layer.  

The Selective Function

 Number five and six are the creepiest of all!  Number 5 is the Selective Function.  What that means is what Darwin meant by natural selection: You are assessing the breeding quality of each individual kid.  You’re doing it structurally because school teachers don’t know this is happening. 

And you’re trying to use ways to prevent the poor stuff from breeding.  And those ways are hanging labels--humiliating labels--around their neck, encouraging the shallowness of thinking.

 I often wondered, because I came from a very very strict Scotish-Irish culture that never allowed you to leer at a girl.  But when I got to NYC, the boys were pawing the girls openly and there was no redress for the girls at all, except not showing up in the classroom--high absentee rates. 

Well, you are supposed to teach structurally that sexual pleasure is what you withdraw from a relationship and everything else is a waste of time and expensive.  

 So, the Selective Function is what Darwin meant by the favored races.  The idea is to consciously improve the breeding stock.  Schools are meant to tag the unfit with their inferiority by poor grades, remedial placement, and humiliation, so that their peers will accept them as inferior.  And the good breeding stock among the females will reject them as possible partners.  

The Propaedeutic Function

 And the Sixth is the creepiest of all! And I think it is partly what Tragedy and Hope is about--a fancy Roman name, the Propaedeutic Function.  Because as early as Roman bigtime thinkers, it was understood that to continue a social form required that some people be trained that they were the custodians of this.  So, some small fraction of the kids are being ready to take over the project. 

That’s the guy--the honor lecturer [Inglis], and it will not surprise you that his ancestors include the major-general of the siege of the Luknow of India--famous for tying the mutineers’ on the muzzle of the cannons and blowing them apart, or somebody who was forced to flee NYC, a churchman at the beginning of the American Revolution, because he wrote a refutation of Thomas Paine’s Common Sense. 

They were going to tar and feather him.  He fled and was rewarded by the British by making him the Bishop of Nova Scotia.  Those are Inglis’ ancestors!  

 So, Al Inglis is certainly--when I learned of this and wrote to Harvard, asking for access to the Inglis Lecture.  Strike me dead, Lord, if I’m exaggerating at all.  I was told “We have no Inglis Lecture--hasn’t been for years, and we have no records. 

It was the same that happened when I discovered that Elwood B. Cubberly, the most influential schoolman of the 20th century and the bionomics genius had been the elementary school editor of Houghton Mifflin, and I wrote Houghton Mifflin--Is there any record? And they said, “We have no record of anyone named Elwood P. Cubberly. 

harvard.png

Now Harvard is telling me, “There is no Inglis Lecture.  A week passed and I got a call from Harvard, from some obscure office at Harvard, saying “What is your interest in the Ingles Lecture?”  I knew that I was on thin ice. 

And I said, “Well, James Conant referred me in his books to the man the Inglis Lecture is named after, and I was just wondering if I could get some background on this fellow, and a list of the lectures.  

 And in due time, I got a list of the lectures and instructions [on] how to access the texts, but not easily. Enough hoops that someone who has to mow the lawn and burp the baby wouldn’t jump through those hoops.  I was able to prove Harper’s [magazine] wouldn’t publish [it in] the cover essay I wrote, which Lew Laflin [?] named Against School, but I had called The Artificial Extension of Childhood because I think that is the key mechanism at work here.  

 So, they wouldn’t print the information about Cubberley because Houghton Mifflin denied it.  It was only months after that I looked through my extensive library of incredibly dull books about schooling, and I opened [one]--and on the facing page said Elwood B. Cubberly, Editor and Chief of Elementary School, publishing arm of Houghton Mifflin. 

By the way, the secondary Editor and Chief was Alexander Ingles.  So you see how this cousinage works.” 

*****

*Video transcribed by Roger Copple. To watch the full 12-minute video: The Six Purposes of Schooling [Video]

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

5 Rules of Handling Books for Civilized Children

When I was younger, I had a friend who was a writer and one day he saw me put a book face down on the table. 

"Oh, horrors!" he exclaimed. "If you knew what went into writing a book, you would never treat it that way." (He was much older and a bit of a Henry Higgins character.)

Will you be surprised if I tell you that in all my years since, I have never once put a book face down on anything. 

Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
— Mark Twain

Books contain the workings of an individual's mind, and ideas, as Aristotle taught, have a divine component to them. I was fortunate that, at a relatively young age, I was taught to respect the written word, something our youth are failing to discover. 

Consider for a moment the origin of new ideas, insights, and understandings and you will begin to get a sense of the wonder of the mind.

And when you grasp that sense, and you consider that an intelligently-written book encapsulates that wonder, you will better understand my 5 rules for treating books with respect. 

5 Rules for  Handling a Book

1. Never Eat While Reading

Have you ever bought a used book only to find a blob of someone's ice cream or chocolate  inside the pages? Talk about horrors. Eating while reading is not a good habit for two reasons: 

  1. Eating without paying attention to what you are eating can contribute to obesity. It's very easy to lose sight of how much we have eaten, when  we are putting food into your mouth mindlessly. With the obesity epidemic in the West, this is a habit we do not want to inculcate in our children.

  2.  Books, like clothes, should be kept clean. I can think of no better reason than when one eats, one should eat, and when one reads, one should read. Furthermore, it was once considered poor manners to eat while reading, and I maintain that it still is. 

2. Always Use a Bookmarker

You will be hard-pressed to find a book in my home without a bookmarker in it. My books are adorned with anything from a scrap of paper (not recommended) to gold-plated bookmarkers (not real gold). 

You should never let your child bend the top of the page to remember where he left off! If you go into a used bookstore, as I often do, you'll notice that older books are devoid of bent pages. This is because people of earlier generations were more civilized and knew how to treat a book. 

The person, be it a gentleman or lady, who had no pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.
— Jane Austen

3. Never Use a Highlighter

Have you ever come across a difficult-to-find used book only to discover that it had been marked up with yellow highlights? Pages full of yellow highlights in a book tell me only one thing, the previous reader never learned how to extract the main point from a passage. 

Another abominable habit is to mark up a book in messy scribbles with ink. A neatly written note on the margin, or even a checkmark by the noteworthy passage is plenty,and a sharpened pencil is the preferred instrument.

4. Treat the Book Cover with Care

I never leave home without a book, and I would teach your children to do the same. We never know if we will get stuck in a long line, staring at the walls (or worse, some unsightly person with rings in his nose, purple-spiked hair, and trousers down to his knees) while we wait for the time to pass.

Invariably, when I forget to bring a book with me, that's the day I get stuck in the long line. It's as if the Universe is reminding me of the importance of this habit. 

Back to my point, before I put my book in my purse, I wrap it up in a very thin book bag. If your child has a backpack, he’ll want to do the same. This way, neither the cover nor the pages will lose the beauty of their form.

If I can't find my book bag, I might wrap it in a scarf; anything of light material will do as long as it will hold the book in place and not weigh down my purse.

In a child’s case, overloaded backpacks can cause back problems, so you’ll want to make sure his bag is not too heavy either.

5. Travel with Care

When I travel, I wrap my books up before I place them in my suitcase. There is nothing more shattering than arriving at my destination only to find my books have been tossed about like a ship caught in a tempest. 

And that, dear reader, completes my 5 rules for handling a book with respect. 

Now, let me tell you about another writer friend who I will never understand. His bookshelves are full of well-read books with food stains, bent pages, torn covers, and all the horrors you can possibly imagine.

He's like a gardener  who creates beautiful gardens for others to enjoy, but tramples on his own. 

I realize, like my friend, you may object to my 5 rules for handling a book, but I can only defend myself by saying that obesity and pages spotted with chocolate are aesthetically unpleasing to the eye, and we should always strive to uphold that which is beautiful.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Replacing Ritalin with Discipline Cures Chemical Imbalances in Children

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You may be worried that your unmanageable child has a chemical imbalance.

Or, maybe a teacher has gone as far as to suggest he should be evaluated for a behavioral disorder, such as ADHD.

What you are not told is that the cure for his difficult behavior may be as easy as a spoonful of discipline.

The Facts

According to John Rosemond, MS and Bose Ravenel, MD, "No studies to date have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that impulsivity and short attention span - the two primary symptoms of ADHD - result from physical problems or chemical imbalances in the brain."

The ADHD Establishment would be hard-pressed to explain how, of all the American cultural groups that share a common European heritage, only the Amish have managed to not become infected with the elusive ADHD gene.
— Rosemond and Ravenel

Rosemond and Ravenel wrote an entire book on the subject called The Diseasing of America's Children: Exposing the ADHD Fiasco and Empowering Parents to Take Back Control, in which they make a strong case for old-fashioned discipline. 

If you have a child who is suspect for one of the three primary behavior disorder diseases, namely ADHD, ODD, or EOBD*, it would be prudent to grab a copy of their book.

The Why

Have you ever wondered why before the progressive 1960's cultural revolution, we have no records of behavior disorders that weren't quickly eradicated by not sparing the rod?

Then, as if children had suddenly changed, behavior disorders as disease were added to the DSM manual. 

Now, instead of discipline, children are given medication for their behavior.

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We are neglecting to treat the real problem, which is that children are failing to grow up because we have lost the art of raising them well

The Problem

When little Susie throws a tantrum in the middle of the department store because she wants a toy, instead of grabbing little Susie by the hand, marching her out of the store, and plopping her into the back seat of your car to let her belt it out, what do we do? 

We try to talk some sense into her while shopping as she continues disturbing the peace.

We may even begin to bribe her with ice cream when she gets home if she promises to stop crying. We might even give her what she wants because we don't have the time or energy to deal with her behavior. 

When Johnny fails to focus long enough to follow our homework instructions or do some chores, what do we do? 

We begin to wonder if his lack of focus has a more sinister cause.

When Adam impulsively pushes his little sister or grabs a toy from another child, we begin to wonder, "Why is he so impulsive?

Could it be?"

These kind of children become prime candidates in school for being singled-out for a behavioral disorder diagnosis. The next step is to send the child for further evaluation. The psychiatrist or psychologist then notes in medical shorthand the following symptoms:

  • Short attention span

  • Lack of self-control; impulsive

  • Difficulty staying on task

  • Impatient

  • Tantrums

  • Easily frustrated

  • Defiant 

  • Irresponsible

The Oversight

What the psychiatrist or psychologist fails to recognize is that these are also the symptoms of a toddler's "terrible two" behavior.

According to Rosemond and Ravenel, the medical expert has failed to recognize the obvious.

As a consequence of the progressive parenting theories that began to surface in the 1960s, children no longer learn the rules of civil behavior lest we harm their self-esteem.

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The postmodern, non-theistic religion of self-esteem has spawned a host of problems for America’s children.
— Rosemond and Ravenel

Consequently, incompetent parenting is mistaken for a behavior disorder that requires medication.

Proving how inconclusive the studies around behavior disorders are, and the impossibility of diagnosing a "chemical imbalance," Rosemond and Ravenel encourage parents to ignore the pharmaceutical cry that something is wrong with their child and look to improve their parenting skills instead.

The Reality

Prior to the 1960’s, only 1 - 3% of the population were diagnosed with problems outside the range of normal. If your child is displaying terrible two symptoms beyond the age of the terrible two's, save yourself the time and expense by self-diagnosing the problem for what it is: lax parenting. 

Teach your child good manners and the code of civil conduct, and you'll see his behavior disorders miraculously disappear. A good place to start is with “please” and “thank you.”

“Look at me when I speak to you and listen,” is also good.

And, "Go to your room until you can behave," never failed anyone.

*Disclaimer: You are the best judge of your child. If you think there is a medical issue, seek medical help. But if you suspect lax parenting is at the root of your child’s behavior, then learning to lead your child with love and authority is where you want to start.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

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As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

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Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling