Dare to Homeschool! Overcoming the Fear that You Are Not Good Enough
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As women, we tend to think we are not enough as we are. Add homeschooling into the mix and our list of not enoughs now includes neither smart, nor patient, nor educated enough to homeschool.
The thought of homeschooling conjures up fears that we may fail; we may disappoint our families, we may hinder our children's chances of success.
We look at brave homeschooling moms and think they are smarter, better educated, and have it more together than we do.
The truth is that even if all of these beliefs were true, which is unlikely, you could still succeed at homeschooling if you put your mind to it.
You can overcome the unwelcome thoughts in your head that say you are less than every other mother trying to give her child a better education at home.
I'm Not Smart Enough or Educated Enough
To this, I would ask, who is? My father was in the category of truly learned men of the 20th century, and he never considered himself educated. My father's position used to baffle me until one day I understood that the more you know, the more you can comprehend how little you know.
We still can’t answer fundamental questions with 100% certainty, such as, Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I going? What is the purpose of my life?
“It’s an irony of life that the most simple questions contain the greatest mysteries.”
While it is true that most of us are far less intelligent than we would have been had we been properly educated during our prime learning years, but we can always choose to correct the problem.
It’s never too late to work at developing our intellects.
We used to think the brain became fixed at a certain age and didn’t change after that, other than to decline as you aged, but neuroscientists have shown that this isn't true. The brain continues to wire itself, which is why learning unto the grave prevents ailments like dementia and Alzheimers.
The good news is that when you homeschool, you will develop your mind alongside your children. Becoming smarter and improving your brain's capacity is a byproduct of homeschooling.
Talk to homeschooling moms you know to see how this works. You'll find that homeschooling moms always have a lot of general knowledge. The more children they have, and therefore teach, the more general knowledge they gain. They can't help it.
Even with no college education, you will still do a better job homeschooling your children than the public school system.
Do not let a feeling of intellectual inferiority stop you. You will rise to the occasion and become a better person yourself by having done so.
I'm too Impatient; I could Never homeschool
You may be impatient, but you can correct this. Impatience stems from three causes: 1) a physical imbalance or 2) an emotional imbalance, 3) bad habits.
Physical Imbalance
When people are irritable and impatient, in Chinese medicine, we diagnose them with having internal heat of either an excess or deficient nature. You can correct this by dietary changes, herbs, alternative healing therapies, and lifestyle changes.
If you feel run down and exhausted, you may be suffering from what we diagnose as deficient Qi. Exhaustion will make you feel impatient and irritable too. You'll yell at your children more, and you'll also have less time for your spouse. The latter can lead to a negative feedback loop.
The less time you have with your spouse, the less support you feel, and the more exacerbated your symptoms become. Instead of being a respite for one another during the years when your young children are more demanding, you grow apart.
Emotional Imbalance
If you find yourself feeling resentful and unhappy with your life, it may be because you aren’t doing anything to replenish yourself. Mothers get into this state when they eliminate all the things they enjoyed doing before having children.
We get too busy, and it’s easy to stop going for bike rides or having lunches with girlfriends, or going to a movie with your spouse, Life suddenly becomes all work and no play.
Play is important for children, but it’s also important for us. Play is what rejuvenates us and keeps us going. Figure out what it is that you love doing most and build some of it back into your life.
“When enough people raise play to the status it deserves in our lives, we will find the world a better place.”
Take care of yourself so you can take better care of those who depend on you without feeling resentful.
Bad Habits
You may have a bad habit of getting upset too quickly. In this case, you want to pay close attention to when this happens so you can start to correct your behavior. Easier said than done, I know, but you can do it.
If you get your irritability and patience level under control, homeschooling will be just one more thing you do during the day.
You May Surprise Yourself
The other consideration is that you may believe you will be an impatient homeschooler, but once you start, you find you have more patience than you realized.
You may enjoy the homeschooling lifestyle so much that you wonder why you didn't start sooner.
But you won't know that until you give it a try. It takes courage, and courage comes from acting despite your fear. We all experience fear, but mothers who homeschool don't let it get in their way.
The cost is too high, and they understand this.
Homeschool the smart way by joining the Smart Homeschooler Academy summer program to learn how to give your child the best of an elite education at home.
How to Raise a More Intelligent Child and an Excellent Reader—a free guide and book list with over 80+ carefully chosen titles.Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 17 years experience working in children’s education.
Using her unusual skill set, she has developed a comprehensive and unique understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to help parents get it right.
Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.
